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As an independent counselor, I've spent almost 10 years working with hundreds of high-achieving high school students and their families on college planning.
Students I coach are regularly accepted to top schools like Harvard, Stanford and Princeton. In addition to academics and extracurriculars, a big part of my job is helping them plan meaningful school breaks.
Summer is a consequential time for kids. It's an opportunity to recharge, build new relationships and explore their interests. When it comes to planning summers, the parents of the most successful kids avoid making these mistakes:
1. They don't start too late
In late spring, I get many inquiries from families who are just starting their summer planning. Unfortunately, a lot of the options are already off the table at this point.
Some of the most competitive programs and internships have November or December deadlines, and many are due in January and February.
Schools will often assemble lists of programs that have been popular with previous students, so check with your child's guidance counselor.
The ideal time to plan for next summer is as soon as the previous summer ends. As you enter the fall, my best advice is to keep track of the deadlines, especially for first-come, first served programs.
2. They don't have just one option for their kids
For the most competitive summer activities, particularly free ones offered through institutions like colleges and museums, admission is not guaranteed. They also tend to fill up in minutes.
Never have your hearts, or plans, set on getting into one specific program. Come up with several different versions of how the summer could unfold.
Sometimes that may mean applying for several opportunities at once, seeing what the results are, and then making an informed decision.
There are many stellar opportunities out there. If you can, try not to introduce stress into what should be a fun family project.
3. They don't only apply for organized activities
While there are plenty of fantastic summer camps, courses and internships, my best advice is to look beyond what college admissions officers often refer to as "sign-up" activities.
Especially for high schoolers, some of the best summer options are never formally listed. They are found through cold emailing or warmer introductions to folks in your professional network, family friends, teacher connections and school alumni.
You can offer suggestions, but ideally, your kids will be in the driver seat for this outreach process. This teaches them how to take initiative and prepares them for future job hunts.
One of my students spent a week talking to a dozen people in design-related careers across New York City, including a tech product manager. This introduction to the field led her to eventually land a job at a major tech company after she graduated college.
Summer jobs and self-directed passion projects are also underrated ways for kids to earn valuable real-world experience.
4. They don't overschedule their kids
Without the scaffolding of school, summer can sometimes feel overwhelming. But studies show that unscheduled time teaches younger kids to be more independent and hone organizational skills that will serve them in adulthood.
If it's feasible for you, there can be value in letting your kids have a "wild summer," or combining this time with a camp or vacation.
Unstructured time is especially meaningful for older kids, too. One of my students got into several prestigious colleges this year. Last summer, he did a paid summer internship that he found on his own.
Outside of it, he left his break open for fun. He played board games with his family, learned to cook, coded an app and hung out with his friends.
By the time they apply for college, kids should know how to claim their free time for things that are meaningful to them, regardless of whether those activities are "productive."
During the college application process, Stanford asks seniors how they spent their last two summers. In my experience, they don't want to see students who are only doing what they're expected to. They want to see students who have taken the time to truly grow.
Theo Wolf is a writer and educator, with a focus on passion and purpose development in young adults. He is on the founding team of Spike Lab, a coaching program for high school students, and helped build Snowday, a free search engine for high school summer and extracurricular programs. Theo is a graduate of Cornell University and a mentor at Harvard University's Lemann Program on Creativity and Entrepreneurship.
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