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The most successful people never think to themselves, "I've made it."
That's according to author Ryan Hawk, who has interviewed more than 600 CEOs, businesspeople and other types of leaders for his podcast "The Learning Leader Show." He's noticed a common theme across many of those conversations, he says: they never think of themselves as having peaked. Hawk, 44, calls it the "never arrived, always becoming" mindset, after JJ Redick — now the head coach of the NBA's Los Angeles Lakers, and an active NBA player at the time — used similar phrasing while talking with Hawk in an August 2017 interview.
It's "this mindset of, no matter what happens in my life ... I just want to work on getting incrementally better," says Hawk, author of the upcoming book, "The Price of Becoming."
The concept is a version of the "growth mindset," a term coined by psychologist Carol Dweck that essentially means always viewing challenges as opportunities to learn and grow. An array of notable people ranging from retired tennis star Serena Williams to Microsoft CEO Satya Nadella have publicly credited their successes — at least in part — to their drive for constant improvement.
Hawk has heard similar versions of the same argument from people like bestselling author James Clear and former Cinnabon CEO Kat Cole. "There's no moment of arrival," says Hawk. "The [successful people] I've interviewed, they're just pushing. They're driving. They're trying to put a positive dent in the world."
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Psychologically, adopting a mindset where you're constantly learning changes your brain and behavior for the better, says Benjamin Granger, chief workplace psychologist at Qualtrics and author of "A Leader Worth Following," which published on Feb. 24.
Practicing and learning new skills enhances and strengthens the connections between brain neurons, a process called synaptic plasticity, according to a 2017 report from The American Society for Cell Biology. "Our brains are highly malleable, and practice and quality repetition lead to physical changes in our brains — and manifest in very real ways in our lives," Granger says.
When you push yourself out of your comfort zone, you have higher odds of making mistakes. Lifelong learners "take time to process their emotions [after a failure], evaluate their performance and then try again, often adjusting their approach," says Granger.
If you need an extra push to keep yourself from getting gotten too comfortable in your personal or professional life, find a few "truth tellers" to hold you accountable, advises Hawk. They can be family members, co-workers, mentors, your spouse or anyone else who you think of as successful, and who knows you well enough to call you out when you're slacking, he says.
"They're willing to push you," says Hawk. Surrounding yourself with those people who keep you humble" allows you to "keep progressing in the right way."
Growth mindsets come with at least one caveat. If you constantly drive yourself to improve — in any, or every, facet of your life — you could accidentally start thinking that no matter what you do, you're never good enough. Some psychologists refer to prioritizing your results and accomplishments above your happiness and mental health as "toxic productivity," and it can lead to burnout, overwork and a general sense of unfulfillment.
If you struggle with taking a moment to be proud of yourself, try a "double-standard test," says psychotherapist and author Chamin Ajjan. Imagine that someone you care about achieved whatever you most recently accomplished. Ask yourself, "What would I say to them?" Whatever those praises are, say them back to yourself, she recommends.
Another strategy: At the end of each day, write down three small "micro-wins" to remind yourself of your progress, Ajjan advises. She calls it a daily "done list," as opposed to a "to-do list."
"These do not have to be major milestones. They can be as simple as navigating a difficult email or showing up for a workout when you were tired," says Ajjan. "By documenting these micro-wins, you are training your brain to recognize and value your own consistency, which is the foundation of genuine self-pride."
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